(Snake and Fizz are rockstars and the twisted wankers behind this site. Follow them on Twitter.)
Television
December 16, 2011
November 30, 2011
March 09, 2011
March 06, 2011
February 26, 2011
February 23, 2011
December 04, 2010
September 01, 2010
July 13, 2010
Crusty Old Vaginas (aka, the Hosts on "The View") Disagree on Mel Gibson Being Crazy
This is really harshing our buzz, but the old chicks on "The View" are bitching about Mel Gibson. So says LifelineLive:
View co-hosts Joy Behar and Whoopi Goldberg are in separate corners when it comes to Mel Gibson.
Yesterday on the show, Whoopi defended Mel, saying, "I know Mel, and I know he's not a racist," Goldberg said. "He may be a bonehead. I can't sit and say that he's a racist, having spent time with him in my house with my kids.
And now, Joy Behar tells The Insider that Mel would not be welcome on the show, especially if Barbara Walters is there. "Barbara would not allow him on the show," Joy says. "Barbara's Jewish, he's an anti-Semite, he's a racist ... so he's done."
More importantly...who gives a shit?
(Snake and Fizz are rockstars and the twisted wankers behind this site. Follow them on Twitter.)
March 22, 2010
March 18, 2010
March 12, 2010
November 15, 2009
Groupie of the Week: January Jones (SNL Fail Aside)
Despite her yawn-inducing performance on last night's "Saturday Night Live", January Jones is still hot. And since we could care less about talent, she becomes our Groupie of the Week.
More January after the jump.
Continue reading "Groupie of the Week: January Jones (SNL Fail Aside)" »
August 05, 2009
If Twitter is to be Believed: Paula Leaving "American Idol"; Ryan Seacrest's Blackberry Explodes
There was some serious tweetin' going on yesterday and this morning as Paula Abdul announced she would be leaving "American Idol" -- apparently because the show didn't want to raise her above minimum wage. Here is what Paula said via her Twitter account:
"With sadness in my heart, I’ve decided not to return..."
"I'll miss nurturing all the new talent, but most of all being a part of a show that I helped from day 1 become an international phenomenon."
Sadly, this news somehow made Ryan Seacrest's cell phone device spontaneously explode. We think it's an assaddination attempt gone awry, but the cell phone companies can never get things right. Anyway, here's what he spat out on his Twitter page about the exploding incident...and about Paula:
"about to go to sleep when I started seeing my blackberry blow up. I have read what u have read and I am shocked and saddened about paula"
Ryan went on to say he plans to try a new hair gel today and get drunk in Paula's honor.
For those interested, the new season of "American Idol" will welcome back Randy Jackson, Simon Cowell, and the hot one. We can't wait to see how quick the new winner will be dropped by their record label.
(Snake and Fizz are rockstars and the twisted wankers behind this site. Follow them on Twitter.)
May 22, 2009
September 30, 2008
Fat People, Unite!
So tonight, the blokes at ABC aired a brilliant show entitled "Half Their Size: The People Magazine Weight Loss Challenge". The show's title indicates fat people will end up weighing half their size after several months of dieting and exercise (FYI, they don't).
Well, Snake and Fizz would like to be the first to congratulate the eight food-loving people who participated in the challenge. We have seen the before and after pictures. The most impressive was the dame who lost 23 pounds in a mere seven months of hard work. What determination!
Hats off to you, large ones. You have gone from being morbidly obese to just being really fat. Be proud!
September 29, 2008
April 16, 2008
Mariah Carey Butchered on Live TV
"American Idol" will boot another flash in the pan hopeful tonight after the contestants butchered Mariah Carey songs on Tuesday evening -- and seriously, aren't those songs already butchered enough? The wrinkled, overdone female judge of course was nice to everyone and the Biritsh bloke had this to say:
"It was a bit like ordering a hamburger and only getting the bun," Cowell told Brooke White after her performance of Hero. "In other words the vital ingredient, the bit in the middle, was missing."
Well said, you sage wordsmith. Most of the Idol dames got similar scorn, but the three remaining fellas got jolly solid remarks. The loser tonight will be put into a glass box with Ms. Carey herself and subjected to her talking until their head explodes. Seems like a cruel punishment, but it is reality TV nonetheless.
April 15, 2008
Stars Dance The Rumba and The Samba
While dancing is a very un-rock star thing to do, we like dames -- fat dames, skinny dames, dames that climb on rocks...well, maybe not fat dames. What we're saying is we like looking at the ladies on "Dancing With The Stars". Last night's show had some caliente-flavored moves as the celebs grooved the samba and the rumba.
Here are the scores from last night:
Lame-ass singer Mario and Karina Smirnoff: 27
Elvis' hot ex Priscilla Presley and Louis van Amstel: 21
Short actress Marissa Janet Winokur and Tony Dovalani: 24
Some Latino actor Cristian de la Fuente and Cheryl Burke: 23
Hearing-challenged Marlee Matlin and Fabian Sanchez: 22
Asian skater Kristi Yamaguchi and Mark Ballas: 29
Naked in American Pie Shannon Elizabeth and Derek Hough: 23
NFL player Jason Taylor and Edyta Sliwinska: 27
None of this means anything to us other than Priscilla Presley is the hottest old dame ever. Also, word has leaked out that Heather Mills will return in the show's finale to do a special dance called "The One-Legged Gold Digger". It should be something special.
April 11, 2008
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